Jeff and I are very happy to announce that Mirabella is going to be a big sister! Yes, we are expecting...again! "What? So soon?" you ask. Uh-huh. Since we believe this is the way things were meant to be for us, this was no accident, but we did not plan for the quick turnaround! Still, we couldn’t be more thrilled about the news of our upcoming arrival. It will definitely be busy around our house having two babies in just over thirteen months (screeeech...yep, you read that correcly...two babies in thirteen months), but with all of you waiting on us hand and foot for oh, the next couple years or so, we know it’ll be a piece of cake. Thanks in advance!
And speaking of cake, we’ll be just about eating the last of it at Mirabella’s first birthday party and it’ll be time to celebrate a new miracle in our lives. Did I hear someone say Irish twins ? No, not quite, but close. Mirabella was born on March 1st, 2009 and this new baby’s due date is April 11th, 2010. After talking with my doctor, I'm fairly certain about having another c-section, so with it most likely being scheduled a week or so ahead of my due date, we’re looking at early April to begin our family of four.
After much anticipation, Jeff and I met with my doctor yesterday (Thursday, September 17th) for my first appointment with him. Jeff had made a quick bathroom stop when I was called in and my doctor, who I couldn't wait to see, greeted me with open arms and a big hug. I said, "Can you believe we're already back?" to which he replied, "Of course I can. When two people are in love, this is what happens!" Still, when Jeff came in, we all couldn't help but chuckle a little.
He talked with us briefly, trying to confirm my due date and then he said we were going to do an ultrasound. He did one early for us last time, but kind of snuck us in since usually at this appointment, you get to hear the heart beat, not see it. But we happily (and somewhat nervously for me) followed. He then told me he was going to do a vaginal ultrasound. Huh? This was such a new prospect for me, so right away I wondered if everything was OK. He started and turned the ultrasound screen more towards him as he looked, further triggering my curiosity. Finally he let us know that everything looked great and that he'd let us see momentarily. He proceeded to show us the beating heart. Ah, sigh of relief. We could already see our baby when he pointed out the head, arms and legs, or the beginnings of both at least. How amazing that we could see so much so soon!
We also received the confirmation that there was only one baby inside. We did wonder (my grandma was a twin). Later we realized that the vaginal ultrasound was most likely because my pregnancy was early on, he wanted to get an idea of the size of my baby to better confirm my due date and to see if there were multiples.
The three of us went back to the examination room and he spent a bunch of time talking about my delivery and the pros and cons of trying to deliver vaginally after my c-section (vbac) and the pros and cons of multiple c-sections. After the discussion, I was pretty much decided upon scheduling a c-section. Sure, there were risks to both, but not because of how close my babies would be, just because that's the nature of the game. Nothing alarmed me, and I was so glad for the reassurance.
My doctor further made us feel at ease when he explained that being able to hear the heart beat at this early stage made the chances of miscarriage highly unlikely, only a two percent chance. Whew. He also said that even though my pregnancies were very close together, there was no reason to suspect any complications. What a relief!
The appointment was fantastic and we couldn't have felt better walking out the door (before getting my flu shot...H1N1 shots come in two next month). It's fair to say, which I did to Jeff prior to getting on the elevator, that we're one of Dr. Chow's favorite couples. Actually, I asked him if he thought so and I know he wanted to say yes. Ha! Really, I'm sure I only feel that way because he's our favorite doctor and because he's so good, I'd guess he makes everyone feel that special. Needless to say, if anyone's looking for a good doctor, I have a glowing recommendation for you.
I'll be 11 weeks pregnant on Sunday. We'll keep you updated on all of the exciting, and much of the not-so-exciting news if you want to follow along with this blog. We'll still have our other one going, The Scene at Eight 19 , for more of the non-pregnancy going ons in our family (and probably some pregnancy tidbits too), but we'll just have to see how managing two blogs goes. For future reference, the link to that one can be found at the bottom of this blog's main page. Cheers to the next big thing in our lives!
Please see the previous post for far too many details about my pregnancy (finding out about this news, mostly) over the last several weeks.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Run it back
Three weeks ago today we found out (again through ept) that it would soon be time to resurrect the Bundle in the Oven blog! We were as shocked as you all reading this probably are. Below is the beginning of our story and we hope like with my pregnancy with Mirabella, you’ll want to follow along. We loved having you here! If I have to remind any of you from the last time, my posts are candid, so consider yourselves once again forewarned!
Still breast feeding full time, I was a little shocked when my first period after having Mirabella came on July 5th, at four months post-delivery. We do know how pregnancy happens, yes, but with my uninterrupted nursing and it taking nine months for a successful endeavor the first time, it was a big surprise when that first period became my last! When August 5th came and went, I still wasn’t alarmed being late since my thought was that it would probably take a while for my body to get back into a normal routine. So I went about my days as usual, but with each passing one, I couldn’t help but think about the what ifs, although those what ifs were planted deep in the back of my mind.
On Tuesday, August 4th I had a golf outing planned after work with my mom, my mother-in-law and one of her friends. The night before, I tried on my clothes to find them snug, less than flattering and very uncomfortable. These were clothes that fit me previously, even with my post-Mirabella body. I guess I suspected they may not fit when I felt the need to try them on the night before wearing them in the first place. Within that week, I seriously felt like I had put on at least five pounds, and pretty much just in my stomach. I had a swollen belly, and looking back on it, I truly think it started the day after we conceived! Now I know that sounds crazy, but I noticed it. I made a joke about it to my mom, saying something to the tune of pregnancy being responsible for this newly found weigh gain I didn’t think I was just imagining (really thinking it was only a joke at the time!). To this, my mom chuckled and replied with something like, “Your problem isn’t pregnancy I’m afraid. Your problem is F-O-O-D (spelled out just like that)!” Thanks a lot, mom! The weight drop that I could only attribute to nursing came to a screeching halt. Maybe my problem really was F-O-O-D, and if it was, I sheepishly would have to say that it wouldn’t surprise me. My body changed overnight. Really. It just took a couple weeks to confirm it in my own mind.
Then came our trip to Ohio for Jeff’s family reunion (Saturday, August 8th-Tuesday, August 11th) and a few things fueled my suspicious mind. I did some research on pregnancy and nursing and learned that many times the taste of the milk will change to the baby. Mirabella pooped five times in a 24 hour period that weekend. I’d feel sensitivity while nursing when I hadn’t for months, another symptom. Coincidences, I was sure. Or was I? The Monday of our trip when we took a road trip to visit Jeff’s uncle on the other side of the family, I had a touch of nausea that I couldn’t shake when we got off Rob’s boat for lunch. I’m not usually one to get sea sick, but maybe this was just a fluke. When we got home, with my mind constantly racing at this point, the time to test had come. Could it really be that I was pregnant again...already? Jeff was fairly certain I was getting somewhat anxious for nothing. I say anxious because neither of us were expecting what we were about to find out and at first, there were many things I felt needed to be worried about if indeed I was pregnant!
Timing for taking the test worked out better for us on Wednesday (Wednesday, August 12th). I say Wednesday worked out better than it did on the Tuesday we got back from Ohio, but Wednesday was not at all ideal when we had just enough time to take the test, process the results and talk for less than ten minutes before I’d have to be out the door for dinner with three of my best girlfriends. With my anxiety in high gear, I felt just like I did the last time we took the test. However, that time I was nervous the test would be negative when we were so hoping for a positive and this time, I was scared about what a positive result would mean for us. There were so many things to think (stress out) about if it was positive this time. Too many to be able to handle! Purely perception at that time, I know now.
The time was up. I asked Jeff to look first and with Mirabella in hand, he said we were going to look together, as a family. Aw, a family. I love our family. Before getting to the test, Jeff says, “Now, this could go a couple different ways. If you aren’t pregnant, are you going to be upset because that will mean you’ve just gained weight from eating and not working out, instead of from pregnancy?” Apparently he concurred with my mom’s way of thinking. How come hardly anyone accuses me of having a tapeworm anymore?
As the three of us walked over...as the two of us walked over and the third was carried...I forced Jeff to look first. Shock filled his eyes and through a slightly confused, nervous smile he said, “I think you better look at this.” “What do you mean? Is it positive?” I asked. He says he’s not completely sure and then I see it and it looks kind of different than last time with one of the lines more faint, but we’re both fairly sure that it means we’re doing it again and ready or not, here comes another bundle! “Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! I can’t believe I’m pregnant again! Oh my gosh?!” I’m sure I must have said that like a broken record. We climbed into our bed with Mirabella and in a daze talked to her about what we had just found out as if she understood. Even though we knew she didn’t know what was going on, she gave us a smile and amidst all of the questions, through that reassuring smile it seemed like we knew all was going to be just fine. Um, maybe that’s clearer now than it was then.
Our few minutes were up and it was time to hit the road to meet my girls. What am I going to say? How am I going to say it? Am I going to say it? Since these were three of my closest friends, I was pretty sure I was going to share the news, even though it was still so early. Kristin was there first and I think I made it five minutes before blurting it out. She was so happy! Surprised too, but more happy and admittedly a little jealous since we had just gone through our pregnancies together and after some time to think about it, she would have been glad to be in the shoes again too! Of course I would have loved that as well, so I fed her full of dirty martinis and encouraged her to sweet talk her husband into trying for baby number three that night. Haha! She helped to calm my racing thoughts and reminded me what a blessing this was. I knew so too, but I had so much fear. We always wanted another baby, but having one so soon did bring up true, unselfish concerns. The main one: could my body handle this pregnancy? I had a rough labor. My uterus tore and I was warned of a possible blood transfusion. It didn’t happen, but I had a c-section and having another one this soon from all indications wasn’t recommended. Was it safe? I didn’t know and I was kind of terrified of the prospect that it wouldn’t be.
Kristin suggested I order a fake martini before Leah and Missy arrived so I could collect my thoughts and make sure I was ready to keep sharing the news. At least I’d get my blue cheese stuffed olives, but drinking the water like it was vodka was almost enough to make my stomach churn. I may have lasted fifteen minutes before blabbing to Leah and Missy and the look on their faces was absolute and utter shock. Nothing else. Well, there was disbelief too. Leah didn’t believe me. Not for a second. Missy, sitting there pregnant about ready to give birth to her baby just over fourteen months from her first knew all too well this was entirely possibly, if not probable! Leah brought up my martini. “You’re having a martini! I don’t believe you!” she says. “It’s fake! It’s water! Try it!” I insisted. Even after she knew I wasn’t kidding, she couldn’t wrap her mind around what I was saying. Neither could I right then. I was still in shock too.
It wasn’t until my ride home that I fully allowed my worries to take over again. I had voiced my concerns to the girls, but it was almost like they hadn’t totally hit me. I hadn’t processed the news. Jeff and I hadn’t processed the news together. I called him on my way home and we talked about the girls’ reactions. Then something came over me and the tears came. I started bawling, letting my fears get the best of me. “How can my body do it again so soon? Where are we going to put the baby? There’s no place to put another baby right now (we have two bedrooms on our main level, ours and Mirabella's)! We’re just getting used to having Mirabella around; how is having another baby so soon going to affect her?” It was when I, barely audible, said, “I’m scared I’m going to die!” (meaning in childbirth) that he asked me to pull over. I can see why that may have been scary. I know now that I was overreacting, but at the time, my first real chance to voice my fears with my husband, those fears were my reality.
By the time I got home, I had calmed down. On the door to get into our house from our garage was a handwritten note from the love of my life. In that instant, my husband put to rest my apprehension, even if only for the short-term, with his words.
Dear Wife,
Today I love you more than ever. Tomorrow I will love you more than I do today. We may have had something crazy, scary and exciting thrown at us today, but there is nobody I'd rather share it with than you. I am so thankful for our wonderful life together and for our beautiful marriage.
All my love,
Jeff
I cried again reading it and typing it here. No, you can't have him! With Jeff and Mirabella by my side, it didn’t matter where the baby’s room would be. It didn’t matter if the baby lived in our room for six months. It didn’t matter if he or she would share a room with Mirabella after. And if we had to consider moving (gasp!), we would consider moving. We wouldn’t enjoy Mirabella’s remaining months of her life as an only child any less. She wouldn’t feel any less love. (In fact, we can see her and her new sibling being the best of friends because they will be so close in age. That’s our hope at least, and having this hope makes us even more happy now for the timing. Plus, she’ll be too young to feel any jealousy about the “new kid on campus”, and she won’t know her life any differently than the one she has with her partner.) And most importantly, I wasn’t going to die in childbirth! The chances were very slim and that was clearer now. All of these things became clearer, and after a day and a half from that Wednesday, my anxiety was really subsiding.
Thursday morning (Thursday, August 13th) came. The sun was shining as we brought Mirabella into our room and talked to her about the new baby coming. She appeared pleased.
I called my clinic later that morning. I spoke with two people and amidst all the questions I had, I started getting choked up right off the bat with the two women I talked to. I wanted my doctor. The protocol is to meet with the nurse practitioner to confirm the pregnancy first, but I wanted Dr. Chow. I needed him to tell me I was going to be OK. Fortunately I received that compassion on the phone that day, especially with the second woman I spoke with. She could tell I was crying and let me know everything was all right. She told me it happens more than I’d think and told me about her friend who gave birth to her first child one December 1st and on that child’s first birthday, she was in labor with her second. That part didn’t sound great, but what did sound great was just hearing about it happening and knowing that if it worked for her, the close timing would work for me too. Things would be good. I believed it. I was excited about it! That woman also reassured me that the nurse practitioner could put all my worries to rest and to feel comfortable meeting with her first and my doctor second. It was a familiar name, the nurse practioner's (I hadn’t had much time to forget names), so that helped. My appointment was set and I wished it could have been that very day, but I’d have to wait a week.
By the day after talking to the clinic, that Friday (Friday, August 14th), I could breathe easily. The prospect of already being into my pregnancy five and half weeks felt nice. The countdown was already on. I was excited for what was to come and there was a lot to look forward to. Sure, I still wished (and wish) we could get that addition on our house right now to add another bedroom by ours and Mirabella’s, but we were going to have another baby to love! What could be more special? What could be more right? My parents came over that night for a casual visit and somehow we started talking about the winning the lottery. My mom had asked if we’d won it, if we’d build on to our house, or move and somewhere along the way I let them know that we were definitely going to need more room. They both looked at me a bit clueless, and then I added that we’d need another bedroom sooner than we thought. “What? Are you pregnant?!” I guess my problem wasn’t just food after all, mom! Jeff and I had big smiles and happily announced that yes, I was pregnant! They were surprised, but smiling and so happy too! We had fun talking about all that was to come. Was it my mom that said, “What if you have twins this time (since it runs in my family)?” Yes, she did, but it was something that had already crossed our minds. Now that would be interesting. Three kids in thirteen months? Mama needs a drink.
Déjà vu and just like last year, our annual Crosslake trip with a bunch of our high school friends was right around the corner. This time we were leaving that next week, on Thursday (Thursday, August 20th), the day of our doctor appointment to confirm the pregnancy. It was too early for us to feel entirely comfortable publicizing the news, but there would again be too many suspicions about my lack of cocktailing if I didn’t, so our dilemma turned into what was inevitable. Besides, these were our close friends and if God forbid anything were to happen to end my pregnancy, these are the people I would want to support us anyway. It became an easy decision.
At the clinic that Thursday, we walked in and it felt like we had never left! The woman who came to get us to take my blood was a friendly, familiar face and greeted us with a big grin. She said she was happy to see us back and then told me about two of her three kids that were very close in age. She let me know honestly that she cried a lot in the beginning, because there were some trying times with two young kiddos, but assured me that things will be great. I believed that. We were having such a good time talking that somehow she pricked my finger and right after told me she wasn’t supposed to do that. It was supposed to come out of my arm! Hey, thanks! Nothing says fun like an unnecessary finger prick.
Before I even left the chair, she confirmed what we thought was the case. I was indeed pregnant and it was official! She walked me to my room where Jeff was waiting and congratulated him too. When the nurse practitioner came in, she also recognized us. This was all kind of funny! The stuff she said was familiar, as she knew it was, but we went through it just the same.
She asked what my normal weight was. As if I knew anymore! My norm wasn't what the scale showed, or at least it never was before I was pregnant the first time, but who knows now? It wouldn’t be out of the question to see that scale tip to 180 by the time this child is set to pop out! OK, for my sanity, let’s say it would. When your husband says, “Wow, you’d be giving me a run for my money if that were the case!” that’s when you have to just tell yourself that even if you do, pregnancy pounds don’t count. They just don’t. Besides, it was Jeff that told me to do whatever I did with Mirabella. Aside from the vitamins (three kinds that I never stopped taking: a multivitamin, folic acid and Expecta), the malts, Potbelly cookies, egg and cheese bagels and Chipotle obviously played a major role in how wonderfully Mirabella turned out. So I’m going back on each.
The nurse practitioner advised that I stop nursing. My milk supply would begin decreasing. I had also heard from a friend that nursing while pregnant increases the chance of miscarriage, although that was not personally confirmed to me. I didn’t fight the issue much. I would make it to my six month goal and I was proud of myself. I enjoyed many things about it, but I was starting to realize how nice it would be to be done with it too. Two kids, one out of the oven and one inside, feeding from me was quite a thought! I knew I’d be doing it that way for another few weeks, but I needed a break before my second round of nursing. Selfishly, I was kind of glad it was doctor’s orders, or nurse practitioner’s orders, to be exact. Based on my exam, she didn’t think my uterus was tracking any larger than usual, so the chances of twins weren’t so likely.
After our appointment, each of us went back to work until we would leave for up north in the afternoon. There was one stop to make before heading up. Jeff and I met at his parents’ house to drop a car off for them and my parents to use for the weekend while they were splitting grandparent time with Mirabella. We sat around talking for a little while when the conversation of Jeff’s cousin came up. We had heard the news previously; she was expecting her second child (the same due date as ours). Before we could say much more, Jeff spit out, “Well, we’re having a baby too!” Actually, I think he said that I was pregnant too, but whatever the exact phrase, they didn’t buy it! Not until we did some convincing and then the hugs came! Typical of what we had seen thus far, shock and surprise followed by happiness and excitement. Those same reactions came again when we told our friends in Crosslake. I’m not sure what made them happier, the fact that we were having a baby, or the fact that they were guaranteed a sober cab again, especially one so experienced like myself! Heehee.
So that’s how it all went down this time and now the nerves kick in. Not the nerves of being pregnant anymore (well probably some of that will come too), but the nerves of making sure our baby is healthy and that we can hear that tiny heart beat in a couple of weeks. We love you already, dear baby! We can’t wait for all the joy that you will bring to our lives, and we are so looking forward to you and Mirabella starting your lives together. We couldn’t be happier you came to us. Even though it was earlier than expected, we know your timing is perfect.
Many people said that after writing Bundle in the Oven the first time, I’d probably never be so detailed for a second pregnancy. I’m sure going to try, and I hope it’s not just repeating more of the same as on the first go around. This is a whole new miraculous experience, so thank you for wanting to follow along with us! As I said in the beginning, we love having you here. We love, love, love your comments too!
PS. My belly button has already started to pop out, at just over eight weeks pregnant! And I thought my stomach was enormous with Mirabella. Looks like I’m really in for it this time!
Still breast feeding full time, I was a little shocked when my first period after having Mirabella came on July 5th, at four months post-delivery. We do know how pregnancy happens, yes, but with my uninterrupted nursing and it taking nine months for a successful endeavor the first time, it was a big surprise when that first period became my last! When August 5th came and went, I still wasn’t alarmed being late since my thought was that it would probably take a while for my body to get back into a normal routine. So I went about my days as usual, but with each passing one, I couldn’t help but think about the what ifs, although those what ifs were planted deep in the back of my mind.
On Tuesday, August 4th I had a golf outing planned after work with my mom, my mother-in-law and one of her friends. The night before, I tried on my clothes to find them snug, less than flattering and very uncomfortable. These were clothes that fit me previously, even with my post-Mirabella body. I guess I suspected they may not fit when I felt the need to try them on the night before wearing them in the first place. Within that week, I seriously felt like I had put on at least five pounds, and pretty much just in my stomach. I had a swollen belly, and looking back on it, I truly think it started the day after we conceived! Now I know that sounds crazy, but I noticed it. I made a joke about it to my mom, saying something to the tune of pregnancy being responsible for this newly found weigh gain I didn’t think I was just imagining (really thinking it was only a joke at the time!). To this, my mom chuckled and replied with something like, “Your problem isn’t pregnancy I’m afraid. Your problem is F-O-O-D (spelled out just like that)!” Thanks a lot, mom! The weight drop that I could only attribute to nursing came to a screeching halt. Maybe my problem really was F-O-O-D, and if it was, I sheepishly would have to say that it wouldn’t surprise me. My body changed overnight. Really. It just took a couple weeks to confirm it in my own mind.
Then came our trip to Ohio for Jeff’s family reunion (Saturday, August 8th-Tuesday, August 11th) and a few things fueled my suspicious mind. I did some research on pregnancy and nursing and learned that many times the taste of the milk will change to the baby. Mirabella pooped five times in a 24 hour period that weekend. I’d feel sensitivity while nursing when I hadn’t for months, another symptom. Coincidences, I was sure. Or was I? The Monday of our trip when we took a road trip to visit Jeff’s uncle on the other side of the family, I had a touch of nausea that I couldn’t shake when we got off Rob’s boat for lunch. I’m not usually one to get sea sick, but maybe this was just a fluke. When we got home, with my mind constantly racing at this point, the time to test had come. Could it really be that I was pregnant again...already? Jeff was fairly certain I was getting somewhat anxious for nothing. I say anxious because neither of us were expecting what we were about to find out and at first, there were many things I felt needed to be worried about if indeed I was pregnant!
Timing for taking the test worked out better for us on Wednesday (Wednesday, August 12th). I say Wednesday worked out better than it did on the Tuesday we got back from Ohio, but Wednesday was not at all ideal when we had just enough time to take the test, process the results and talk for less than ten minutes before I’d have to be out the door for dinner with three of my best girlfriends. With my anxiety in high gear, I felt just like I did the last time we took the test. However, that time I was nervous the test would be negative when we were so hoping for a positive and this time, I was scared about what a positive result would mean for us. There were so many things to think (stress out) about if it was positive this time. Too many to be able to handle! Purely perception at that time, I know now.
The time was up. I asked Jeff to look first and with Mirabella in hand, he said we were going to look together, as a family. Aw, a family. I love our family. Before getting to the test, Jeff says, “Now, this could go a couple different ways. If you aren’t pregnant, are you going to be upset because that will mean you’ve just gained weight from eating and not working out, instead of from pregnancy?” Apparently he concurred with my mom’s way of thinking. How come hardly anyone accuses me of having a tapeworm anymore?
As the three of us walked over...as the two of us walked over and the third was carried...I forced Jeff to look first. Shock filled his eyes and through a slightly confused, nervous smile he said, “I think you better look at this.” “What do you mean? Is it positive?” I asked. He says he’s not completely sure and then I see it and it looks kind of different than last time with one of the lines more faint, but we’re both fairly sure that it means we’re doing it again and ready or not, here comes another bundle! “Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! I can’t believe I’m pregnant again! Oh my gosh?!” I’m sure I must have said that like a broken record. We climbed into our bed with Mirabella and in a daze talked to her about what we had just found out as if she understood. Even though we knew she didn’t know what was going on, she gave us a smile and amidst all of the questions, through that reassuring smile it seemed like we knew all was going to be just fine. Um, maybe that’s clearer now than it was then.
Our few minutes were up and it was time to hit the road to meet my girls. What am I going to say? How am I going to say it? Am I going to say it? Since these were three of my closest friends, I was pretty sure I was going to share the news, even though it was still so early. Kristin was there first and I think I made it five minutes before blurting it out. She was so happy! Surprised too, but more happy and admittedly a little jealous since we had just gone through our pregnancies together and after some time to think about it, she would have been glad to be in the shoes again too! Of course I would have loved that as well, so I fed her full of dirty martinis and encouraged her to sweet talk her husband into trying for baby number three that night. Haha! She helped to calm my racing thoughts and reminded me what a blessing this was. I knew so too, but I had so much fear. We always wanted another baby, but having one so soon did bring up true, unselfish concerns. The main one: could my body handle this pregnancy? I had a rough labor. My uterus tore and I was warned of a possible blood transfusion. It didn’t happen, but I had a c-section and having another one this soon from all indications wasn’t recommended. Was it safe? I didn’t know and I was kind of terrified of the prospect that it wouldn’t be.
Kristin suggested I order a fake martini before Leah and Missy arrived so I could collect my thoughts and make sure I was ready to keep sharing the news. At least I’d get my blue cheese stuffed olives, but drinking the water like it was vodka was almost enough to make my stomach churn. I may have lasted fifteen minutes before blabbing to Leah and Missy and the look on their faces was absolute and utter shock. Nothing else. Well, there was disbelief too. Leah didn’t believe me. Not for a second. Missy, sitting there pregnant about ready to give birth to her baby just over fourteen months from her first knew all too well this was entirely possibly, if not probable! Leah brought up my martini. “You’re having a martini! I don’t believe you!” she says. “It’s fake! It’s water! Try it!” I insisted. Even after she knew I wasn’t kidding, she couldn’t wrap her mind around what I was saying. Neither could I right then. I was still in shock too.
It wasn’t until my ride home that I fully allowed my worries to take over again. I had voiced my concerns to the girls, but it was almost like they hadn’t totally hit me. I hadn’t processed the news. Jeff and I hadn’t processed the news together. I called him on my way home and we talked about the girls’ reactions. Then something came over me and the tears came. I started bawling, letting my fears get the best of me. “How can my body do it again so soon? Where are we going to put the baby? There’s no place to put another baby right now (we have two bedrooms on our main level, ours and Mirabella's)! We’re just getting used to having Mirabella around; how is having another baby so soon going to affect her?” It was when I, barely audible, said, “I’m scared I’m going to die!” (meaning in childbirth) that he asked me to pull over. I can see why that may have been scary. I know now that I was overreacting, but at the time, my first real chance to voice my fears with my husband, those fears were my reality.
By the time I got home, I had calmed down. On the door to get into our house from our garage was a handwritten note from the love of my life. In that instant, my husband put to rest my apprehension, even if only for the short-term, with his words.
Dear Wife,
Today I love you more than ever. Tomorrow I will love you more than I do today. We may have had something crazy, scary and exciting thrown at us today, but there is nobody I'd rather share it with than you. I am so thankful for our wonderful life together and for our beautiful marriage.
All my love,
Jeff
I cried again reading it and typing it here. No, you can't have him! With Jeff and Mirabella by my side, it didn’t matter where the baby’s room would be. It didn’t matter if the baby lived in our room for six months. It didn’t matter if he or she would share a room with Mirabella after. And if we had to consider moving (gasp!), we would consider moving. We wouldn’t enjoy Mirabella’s remaining months of her life as an only child any less. She wouldn’t feel any less love. (In fact, we can see her and her new sibling being the best of friends because they will be so close in age. That’s our hope at least, and having this hope makes us even more happy now for the timing. Plus, she’ll be too young to feel any jealousy about the “new kid on campus”, and she won’t know her life any differently than the one she has with her partner.) And most importantly, I wasn’t going to die in childbirth! The chances were very slim and that was clearer now. All of these things became clearer, and after a day and a half from that Wednesday, my anxiety was really subsiding.
Thursday morning (Thursday, August 13th) came. The sun was shining as we brought Mirabella into our room and talked to her about the new baby coming. She appeared pleased.
I called my clinic later that morning. I spoke with two people and amidst all the questions I had, I started getting choked up right off the bat with the two women I talked to. I wanted my doctor. The protocol is to meet with the nurse practitioner to confirm the pregnancy first, but I wanted Dr. Chow. I needed him to tell me I was going to be OK. Fortunately I received that compassion on the phone that day, especially with the second woman I spoke with. She could tell I was crying and let me know everything was all right. She told me it happens more than I’d think and told me about her friend who gave birth to her first child one December 1st and on that child’s first birthday, she was in labor with her second. That part didn’t sound great, but what did sound great was just hearing about it happening and knowing that if it worked for her, the close timing would work for me too. Things would be good. I believed it. I was excited about it! That woman also reassured me that the nurse practitioner could put all my worries to rest and to feel comfortable meeting with her first and my doctor second. It was a familiar name, the nurse practioner's (I hadn’t had much time to forget names), so that helped. My appointment was set and I wished it could have been that very day, but I’d have to wait a week.
By the day after talking to the clinic, that Friday (Friday, August 14th), I could breathe easily. The prospect of already being into my pregnancy five and half weeks felt nice. The countdown was already on. I was excited for what was to come and there was a lot to look forward to. Sure, I still wished (and wish) we could get that addition on our house right now to add another bedroom by ours and Mirabella’s, but we were going to have another baby to love! What could be more special? What could be more right? My parents came over that night for a casual visit and somehow we started talking about the winning the lottery. My mom had asked if we’d won it, if we’d build on to our house, or move and somewhere along the way I let them know that we were definitely going to need more room. They both looked at me a bit clueless, and then I added that we’d need another bedroom sooner than we thought. “What? Are you pregnant?!” I guess my problem wasn’t just food after all, mom! Jeff and I had big smiles and happily announced that yes, I was pregnant! They were surprised, but smiling and so happy too! We had fun talking about all that was to come. Was it my mom that said, “What if you have twins this time (since it runs in my family)?” Yes, she did, but it was something that had already crossed our minds. Now that would be interesting. Three kids in thirteen months? Mama needs a drink.
Déjà vu and just like last year, our annual Crosslake trip with a bunch of our high school friends was right around the corner. This time we were leaving that next week, on Thursday (Thursday, August 20th), the day of our doctor appointment to confirm the pregnancy. It was too early for us to feel entirely comfortable publicizing the news, but there would again be too many suspicions about my lack of cocktailing if I didn’t, so our dilemma turned into what was inevitable. Besides, these were our close friends and if God forbid anything were to happen to end my pregnancy, these are the people I would want to support us anyway. It became an easy decision.
At the clinic that Thursday, we walked in and it felt like we had never left! The woman who came to get us to take my blood was a friendly, familiar face and greeted us with a big grin. She said she was happy to see us back and then told me about two of her three kids that were very close in age. She let me know honestly that she cried a lot in the beginning, because there were some trying times with two young kiddos, but assured me that things will be great. I believed that. We were having such a good time talking that somehow she pricked my finger and right after told me she wasn’t supposed to do that. It was supposed to come out of my arm! Hey, thanks! Nothing says fun like an unnecessary finger prick.
Before I even left the chair, she confirmed what we thought was the case. I was indeed pregnant and it was official! She walked me to my room where Jeff was waiting and congratulated him too. When the nurse practitioner came in, she also recognized us. This was all kind of funny! The stuff she said was familiar, as she knew it was, but we went through it just the same.
She asked what my normal weight was. As if I knew anymore! My norm wasn't what the scale showed, or at least it never was before I was pregnant the first time, but who knows now? It wouldn’t be out of the question to see that scale tip to 180 by the time this child is set to pop out! OK, for my sanity, let’s say it would. When your husband says, “Wow, you’d be giving me a run for my money if that were the case!” that’s when you have to just tell yourself that even if you do, pregnancy pounds don’t count. They just don’t. Besides, it was Jeff that told me to do whatever I did with Mirabella. Aside from the vitamins (three kinds that I never stopped taking: a multivitamin, folic acid and Expecta), the malts, Potbelly cookies, egg and cheese bagels and Chipotle obviously played a major role in how wonderfully Mirabella turned out. So I’m going back on each.
The nurse practitioner advised that I stop nursing. My milk supply would begin decreasing. I had also heard from a friend that nursing while pregnant increases the chance of miscarriage, although that was not personally confirmed to me. I didn’t fight the issue much. I would make it to my six month goal and I was proud of myself. I enjoyed many things about it, but I was starting to realize how nice it would be to be done with it too. Two kids, one out of the oven and one inside, feeding from me was quite a thought! I knew I’d be doing it that way for another few weeks, but I needed a break before my second round of nursing. Selfishly, I was kind of glad it was doctor’s orders, or nurse practitioner’s orders, to be exact. Based on my exam, she didn’t think my uterus was tracking any larger than usual, so the chances of twins weren’t so likely.
After our appointment, each of us went back to work until we would leave for up north in the afternoon. There was one stop to make before heading up. Jeff and I met at his parents’ house to drop a car off for them and my parents to use for the weekend while they were splitting grandparent time with Mirabella. We sat around talking for a little while when the conversation of Jeff’s cousin came up. We had heard the news previously; she was expecting her second child (the same due date as ours). Before we could say much more, Jeff spit out, “Well, we’re having a baby too!” Actually, I think he said that I was pregnant too, but whatever the exact phrase, they didn’t buy it! Not until we did some convincing and then the hugs came! Typical of what we had seen thus far, shock and surprise followed by happiness and excitement. Those same reactions came again when we told our friends in Crosslake. I’m not sure what made them happier, the fact that we were having a baby, or the fact that they were guaranteed a sober cab again, especially one so experienced like myself! Heehee.
So that’s how it all went down this time and now the nerves kick in. Not the nerves of being pregnant anymore (well probably some of that will come too), but the nerves of making sure our baby is healthy and that we can hear that tiny heart beat in a couple of weeks. We love you already, dear baby! We can’t wait for all the joy that you will bring to our lives, and we are so looking forward to you and Mirabella starting your lives together. We couldn’t be happier you came to us. Even though it was earlier than expected, we know your timing is perfect.
Many people said that after writing Bundle in the Oven the first time, I’d probably never be so detailed for a second pregnancy. I’m sure going to try, and I hope it’s not just repeating more of the same as on the first go around. This is a whole new miraculous experience, so thank you for wanting to follow along with us! As I said in the beginning, we love having you here. We love, love, love your comments too!
PS. My belly button has already started to pop out, at just over eight weeks pregnant! And I thought my stomach was enormous with Mirabella. Looks like I’m really in for it this time!
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